


What's Actually Important

by InkstainedGwyn



Category: Persona 4
Genre: Anime, Fluff, M/M, Spoilers, and ofc it will be a happy ending
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-22
Updated: 2017-05-22
Packaged: 2018-11-03 14:07:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10968810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InkstainedGwyn/pseuds/InkstainedGwyn
Summary: A look at what's going on with Yu and Yosuke in the anime, and how they come to realise just how much they mean to each other, and what they intend to do about it.





	What's Actually Important

**Author's Note:**

> So I finally finished the anime because I never quite realised just _how strong_ the Souyo was there, so I kept putting it off. I'm so glad I watched it! It was wonderful, but I kept wanting to see more, I kept wanting to see all of those amazing scenes from inside the characters heads - and I wanted a confession, and for Yu to come back.
> 
> I know that it's Golden Week when Arena happens, and that won't take place in this story. My Arena stories will be separate from this.
> 
> Warning, this does start out with the Nanako stuff, but if you know the story, you know that has a happy ending. Also, I left out Teddie's stuff (sorry, Teddie!) because I wanted to focus on Yu and Yosuke.
> 
> Ugh, I love them so much! The anime is full of too much perfection.

The day that Nanako died was the day that Yu realised that he was in love with Yosuke. He’d been too numb to understand it immediately - all he knew was that he’d lost his little sister and his world was falling apart - but the relief he’d felt when Yosuke came back to comfort him was far more than he could ever feel for someone who was only a friend, even one so close. He’d been so terrified that he’d lost Yosuke, his best friend, his _other half_ , because he’d chosen to follow what he felt was _right_ and not what his partner wanted; when he looked up outside the hospital to see the brunette watching him with compassionate eyes - albeit with an expression that said he was still angry - Yu felt a moment’s respite that was strong enough to make him forget his broken heart, if just for a second.

For a time, neither of them spoke. Having Yosuke at his side made it easier to accept the tears, and when Yosuke turned to pull Yu’s head onto his shoulder, putting a hand out to steady him, the bereft leader finally felt as if the ground beneath his feet was no longer crumbling. The brunette’s presence was the greatest comfort he could have had at that moment, and eventually the tears slowed; without lifting his face, he gave a shuddering sigh. 

“Yosuke… tell me… did I do the right thing? Up there in _his_ room, when I stopped it?”

There was a long silence, and the brunette gave a long sigh, echoing Yu’s. Finally, he spoke.

“I don’t know. I really don’t. But what’s done is done, and we can’t change it, so we’ll just have to make the most of it, and fix it if it’s not.”

His use of the word _we_ gave Yu heart, if only a little. “Together?”

“Huh?” Yosuke pulled back a little at this, and Yu looked up at him. The expression of surprise wasn’t what he’d been expecting, but at least it wasn’t anger or disgust. “What are you talking about? Of course we’ll do it together. When would that have changed?”

“I- don’t know. Just… thank god.. Yosuke, I thought you’d hate me after that. I know how you felt, and I know-”

“Hey.” Cutting him off, the brunette put both hands on Yu’s shoulders. “I’m still mad, I’m not gonna lie about that. Even if I don’t agree with the outcome, though, I understand your reasoning, and… dammit, Yu. You’re our leader, you know? What kind of partner would I be if I stopped listening to you the second you said something I didn’t agree with? Besides… you were right, you know. If we’d done it, we would have been just as bad as him. Maybe that’s what was needed, but we can’t jump on something like that on a whim. And I… I trust you, you know? You’ve never led us astray yet.”

“Oh, Yosuke…” His voice choked, Yu buried his face against the brunette’s shoulder again. Normally he’d never have been so forward, but right now he needed the comfort - and Yosuke understood. They stood like that for some time before finally, the brunette pushed him back, gently.

“It’s snowing, and we need to get you home. Come on, partner. Let’s go.”

* * *

A couple of hours, one shower, two mugs of tea, and one bowl of instant udon later, Souji lay in his futon, staring up at the ceiling. If he turned his head, he could just see Yosuke's silhouette, sleeping on his side on the couch; the brunette had insisted on staying, saying that _somebody_ had to make sure Yu got up on time the next morning. Yu had tried to argue, but the words stuck in his throat; he couldn’t do _anything_ alone right now, and he knew it. 

It wasn’t a surprise that he couldn’t sleep, but he hadn’t expected for his thoughts to trend towards Yosuke instead of… instead of Nanako. Maybe it was just his brain’s way of protecting his still-fragile heart, but instead of thinking of the tragedy of the day, he found himself thinking about the brunette who was asleep across the room. 

_Yosuke. When I thought I lost his trust earlier, it was… I didn’t know how I was going to go on. Even if I hadn’t just lost…_ Here, his thoughts stuttered and he squeezed his eyes closed, skipping past the name he _couldn’t_ say. _I would have been just as terrified even if nothing else had happened. That was the hardest decision I’ve ever made in my life. But then… he came back, and…_ Yu found himself choking up. _He came back. And he stayed with me. And I need him. I need him by my side, I never thought I’d find somebody who completes me like this. He’s my best friend, my partner… he’s saved me so many times, both in the TV and here in Inaba…_

_I love him._

The thought was a sobering one. He didn’t doubt that he mattered to Yosuke. He knew that the brunette considered them best friends, just as Yu did, to the point that he even came back - when still angry - to make sure his partner was okay. He was the one who _started_ the whole partner business, after all. But love? He shook his head, thinking about Kanji’s shadow, about Saki Konishi, even about the culture festival the month before, when the brunette had completely flipped out when Yu was joking around, pretending to be one of the girls. It had been so clear that he’d been uncomfortable that Yu had felt bad about the whole thing.

Sighing quietly, he closed his eyes for a moment to rest them; he’d been counting lines on the ceiling for too long, and it was beginning to feel like a pointless cycle. He could feel the faintest stirrings of a headache behind his right eye, and that was the _last_ thing he needed to deal with. It took him some time, but he was just feeling the pain recede when Yosuke’s voice made him jump. 

Opening his eyes, he was startled to realise that it was morning, and that the sun had been up for at least a couple of hours. The brunette chuckled a little as Yu sat up, feeling dazed.

“Looks like you actually got some decent sleep there, partner. Wasn’t expecting that, but I’m glad. You were snoring away when I came to wake you up.”

Feeling himself blush, Yu put on an indignant expression. “I was not! I don’t snore!” 

“Uh huh, suuure.”

They looked at each other for a moment before Yu felt his shoulders shake; as he started to laugh, Yosuke joined in, and the brunette held a hand out to help him to his feet. As the laughter slowly died down and Yu followed his friend downstairs, he pushed last night’s thoughts to the back of his head.

_I don’t need to deal with that right now. This is more than enough._

* * *

Breakfast could have gone better; Yosuke - who wasn’t feeling particularly hungry either after the tragedy the day before - was watching Yu try to choke down a slice of toast when the TV, which he’d turned to a home-and-garden channel in the hopes of filling the house with background noise, switched to a Junes commercial. Immediately he’d leapt to his feet, running to turn off the offending appliance, but when he turned back to look at Yu he saw his partner’s shoulders - which seemed thinner in his winter turtleneck, as if he’d not been taking care of himself the last few weeks - shaking. 

His heart clenching, Yosuke hurried over to wrap an arm around Souji’s too-slim shoulders. “Partner. If you’re not feeling it, just finish your coffee; the others are gonna be waiting for us soon enough. Remember Naoto’s text.”

The look that Yu gave him was one of gratitude tinged with pain, and it smote the brunette’s heart even further. He’d felt terrible about blowing up at his partner almost immediately after it had happened - even if he wanted Namatame dealt with immediately, he _knew_ that it wasn’t possible - and knowing what kind of agony Yu was going through at the moment hurt Yosuke almost as much as Nanako’s death had. He knew there wasn’t anything he could do to make it better, but if there had been, he probably would have done it. 

The group meeting and subsequent questioning of Namatame did a lot to change Yosuke’s mind about the man, and he couldn’t help feeling gratitude and relief at his partner for having stopped him from doing anything rash. He’d just been mulling over the best way to say thank you without bringing up a topic that was still too raw, too difficult, when they stepped out of Namatame’s room; he was pacing at Yu’s side, no one saying much of anything, when a harried nurse rushed up to them.

“Mr. Narukami? I need you to come with me, quickly!” 

Everyone looked at each other, but Yosuke only had eyes for Yu. The only thing he could imagine that could still go wrong was Dojima’s health; it was obvious that Yu had come to the same conclusion because he went white and immediately hurried after the nurse. Yosuke kept at his side, with everyone else following behind; it only made things worse when they found themselves back in the ICU. Watching as Yu pulled the door open with shaking hands, the brunette followed behind into the room; it wasn’t until his partner stopped still with a gasp of surprise - and Yosuke bumped into his back - that he even had an inkling that anything was amiss.

Looking up, he was shocked to see that the figure in the bed was not Dojima, it was a small girl - it was _Nanako_ \- and she was hooked back up to the same heart monitors, and they were beeping, and the mask over her mouth and nose was fogging, and-

_Oh my god, how is this even real? She’s alive! It’s a miracle!_

He looked at Yu in time to see the silver-haired boy stagger; Yosuke caught him at this, as if on autopilot, still feeling too stunned to register _anything_. Dojima, standing on crutches on the other side of the bed, made his way shakily towards his overwhelmed nephew, and the two shared a moment of disbelief as Yosuke let himself sink backwards against the wall. 

Around him, everyone else rejoiced; there were exclamations of “Thank god!” and “It’s a miracle!” but Yosuke couldn’t find the words to say _anything_ , his heart was so full. He loved Nanako as if she’d been his own little sister, and his relief at seeing her safe and _alive_ outstripped anything he’d ever felt before.

_Anything other than the moment I saw Souji break free from Kunino-Sagiri, that is._

He ignored that thought - it was part of something larger that he hadn’t allowed himself time to examine yet - and put a hand up to his eyes, trying to hide the fact that tears were flowing as fast down his cheeks as they were down Rise’s or Yukiko’s. He only partially succeeded; looking up, he was embarrassed to find that Yu was looking at him from across Nanako’s bed - but the happy, _gentle_ look in his partner’s eyes was enough to convince him that perhaps…

 _perhaps_...

everything was going to be okay.

* * *

They were only allowed to stay in Nanako’s room for a little while - she wasn’t awake, after all - but the doctor assured Yu and Dojima, once out in the hall, that he had high hopes for the little girl’s recovery, and that Yu and his friends would be able to visit again on the morrow. He and Dojima bid one another a silent, if joyful, farewell, and Yu turned back to his friends, grateful for all of the glad smiles and tearful expressions that looked back at him. Yosuke, especially - standing at his side, as always - looked so _happy_ that Yu almost wanted to tease him. He didn’t, of course - his own heart was so full of gratitude that he couldn’t blame anyone else for being happy - but seeing Yosuke’s smile made him feel that much better.

They knew they had planning to do - it was clear now that Namatame _wasn’t_ the person behind Saki and Mayumi Yamano’s deaths, and nobody had figured out _what_ was going on with Mitsuo Kubo - but they were all so worn out from the emotional roller coaster of the last two days that they decided to call it a day outside the hospital. It was clear that Yosuke wanted to walk Yu home again - and to be honest, Yu wouldn’t have minded it - but he also knew that he was just going to go home and sleep, and Yosuke looked just as exhausted. Besides, the brunette hadn’t been home in over a day, and even if his parents were always working, they deserved to know what was going on.

They compromised by walking together to the split at the floodplain; one path would take Yu home, the other Yosuke, albeit in a slightly more round-about way. As they made their way down the sidewalk, shoes crunching against the light snow that had fallen the night before, Yu couldn’t help musing on just how much of a miracle that day had _been_. He honestly couldn’t believe it, even now, but he knew it was true, and he’d never felt so relieved before. 

At his side, Yosuke kept up a light conversation - mostly about what they were going to do with Nanako when she was out of the hospital - and Yu kept pace with the discussion, all the while thinking about how much he _loved_ Yosuke. Now that he’d come to the realisation, it wasn’t something he was ever going to deny again - but he also knew, objectively, that it wasn’t anything he was ever going to admit. How could he? All signs pointed to Yosuke _not_ feeling the same way, and the friendship they had was so important, so precious to Yu that he’d never do anything to endanger it.

It hurt, a little. But he was so overwhelmed with Nanako’s recovery that it didn’t hurt as much as it _could_ have, and he was good at ignoring things he couldn’t have. And he still had Yosuke’s friendship - _best_ friendship - and that was worth everything.

The friends parted at the floodplain with weary, triumphant smiles, and Yu went home. He got some tea and sat down at the kotatsu, meaning to check the weather and see if the news had anything that might jog his brain, but within minutes he was fast asleep, head on his crossed arms. He’d had his phone out, meaning to text Yosuke, but he never made it past the home screen. Asleep, he missed the countless texts from his friends - everyone had heard about Nanako - on top of the handful of messages from Yosuke, checking up on his partner.

They’d be there to put a smile on his face, however, when he woke up the next morning, having slept well for the first time in weeks.

* * *

At the Hanamuras’ house, Yosuke laid back on his bed, looking up at the ceiling as he spun his cell phone between his fingers. He was hoping that Yu would text him back, but he knew that his partner had probably fallen asleep as soon as he’d gotten home - and that was a _good_ thing. He knew Yu hadn’t been sleeping well, and for good reason; even if Yosuke wanted to talk more with his partner (he _always_ wanted to talk more with his partner) he knew when practicality had to come first.

Of course, the _always_ wanting to talk more to his partner didn’t exactly escape his notice. It was part of a much larger issue that he’d been ignoring for months, at least since they’d gone into the TV to find Kubo ( _since the beginning_ , whispered a small corner of his heart, although he pushed that aside.) In the end, it didn’t really matter _when_ he’d started to feel this way, the fact was that he _did_. 

At first, it was just best friends, and best friends became partners.  Yu had been someone for Yosuke to identify with, first, and to rely on, second. Having someone like Yu accept him, even after seeing his ugly, shitty shadow, had made Yosuke feel like he was finally _worth_ something. And then Kubo’s shadow had come along and he’d realised that _Yu_ needed _Yosuke_ , too. He didn’t know how that was possible, but it was.

But that realisation had only muddied the waters. It was one thing, feeling like Yu was this legend for him to look up to, but finding out that Yu needed him changed the dynamic, and “looking up to” wasn’t what Yosuke _wanted_ any more. He wanted to stand next to his partner, side-by-side, back-to-back, shoulder-to-shoulder. He wanted to be Yu’s equal. He’d started calling them ‘partners’ because of that need, but he’d never once felt like he’d gotten there. And it bothered him, because Yu was such a huge part of his heart that really… well, was it any wonder that he couldn’t help freaking out when Yu pulled that stupid stunt at the group date cafe? How was Yosuke supposed to answer a question like “which of us would you date” when Yu was looking at him with those eyes? He _had_ to be playing around - Yosuke wasn’t _that_ stupid, and Yu _was_ that weird - but how else was Yosuke supposed to respond?

 _Rrrgh! Just admit it, Hanamura - you’re in love with Yu. You’ve been in love with him for a long time, and it’s killing you. It’s killing you that even when you love him, you’re jealous of him - only Yu Narukami could become a hero in his first week in the sticks. He didn’t even have a shadow! But he needs you, and you need him… if you weren’t such a jealous fuck, you’d be able to stand next to him and support him - even if he doesn’t love you, he still_ needs _you, and you can support him. You just have to get over yourself!_

Yosuke wasn’t even sure if he was jealous any more - he cared _so_ much for Yu that at this point, it was quite possibly just guilt remaining - but it didn’t matter. It was something he had to get over, get beyond - but how?


End file.
